Thursday, May 07, 2009

Bus talk: To bounce or not to bounce

Sometimes overheard bus conversations are incredibly annoying. One earlier this week: A schlubby-looking 20-something guy with spectacles and sensible shoes and white socks making plans for a "blow-out" party. He kept giving his phone-friend instructions to bring the lights---he wants them not too bright; like white Christmas lights, but not too many---and don't forget the "sound equipment"...

The soiree is to be held in someone's garage (presumably Bernie's). And they're not going to let anyone OUT of the garage, because if they did, every time they'd open the door, that might invite police attention. (Trapped in a garage with a string of Christmas lights and what will probably turn out to be a boom-box...Sounds like a blast!) After telling the friend for the millionth time to bring the lights, Young Bernie Suave then added a final business-like grace note: "All I want to do now is go home and take a big shit. I'll call you back." Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!

Yesterday, though, the bus phone-calls got better. A young woman sat behind me and put in a call to, not her best friend Tara, but another one of her homegirls, Tyesha. Turns out that the young woman (who sounded like a slightly more well-spoken and subdued Rosie Perez) had days before texted Tyesha that, if worse came to worse, could Rosie Jr. and her son come stay with her? Tyesha texted back with, "When are you thinking of moving?" Well, looks like Rosie's live-in boyfriend Chris read Tyesha's text, which provoked a crisis since he apparently hadn't been aware that Rosie wanted to move out!

Now, Rosie doesn't REALLY want to move out, but Chris has been acting badly lately, very jealous, starting fights, going through her texts, etc. But why should he be acting that way? HE's the one whose MySpace page still lists his status as "single," even though he and Rosie have been living together for months. And she told him she didn't like that, but...every time she checks his page, it still says "single"!

A few days earlier, Rosie had sat Chris down and asked him straight up: "Can you handle my truth?" Then she gave it to him. She didn't want to bounce. She is so into him. Doesn't she come home from work every night and first thing fix his dinner? "Everything about me tells him I'm his woman." So why, Tyesha, is he acting "retarded"?

Seems Chris has a history of acting this way. When they first started dating, one of Rosie's homegirls (who's 40, but still looks good, although she "has a little bit of ghetto in her. But then don't we all.") somehow got a hold of Chris's address and some private cell phone numbers. Chris had told Rosie he was separated from his wife, but when LilBitO'Ghetto drove to Chris's house one evening, there he was with the wife, looking husbandly while taking out the garbage. Then when LBOG tried one of the secretly obtained cell numbers, lo and behold, his wife answered, and kids were crying in the background... Busted!

At this point, Tyesha had another call, so had to let Rosie go. Darnit! I had really wanted to know how Rosie initially got past the fact that Chris had lied to her about his wife...And, most importantly: Will she or will she not bounce??

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