Thursday, September 03, 2009

"Meet Cute" vs. "Meet Cuckoo"

Now this sounds like a "meet cute" scenario for a romantic comedy: Woman stands alone at a railing overlooking the Hudson, gazing at the New York City skyline as the sun sets and the lights start to go on over the city. 100 feet or so away, a man is walking his poodle, who suddenly runs away from him. The man calls frantically, but the little dog is sassy, and keeps running. Until he gets to where the woman is standing. The poodle stops right there and looks back expectantly at the man, waiting for him to catch up. The woman smiles at the dog and starts to talk to him while the man approaches. Once the man gets there, the dog runs off again, but this time the man lets him go, deciding to stay and talk to the woman...

The man introduces himself, and says he's running for Congress. He points to his car, which, sure 'nuff, has a big "J--- B--- for Congress" sign on the back of it. So far, so good. But then, he goes on. (And, are those shadows, or does he have a few teeth missing?) Not only is he running for Congress, but he's also running for governor. And last time he ran for governor he came in second, only the media didn't tell us that. And he's been on "60 Minutes," only they edited his interview out. And he's friends with the Bushes and knows their business, and someone out there doesn't like that. (I couldn't figure out who -- the Bushes, or the liberals.) And how long have I lived in Weehawken?

By this time, the polite smile was frozen on my face. "Not long. I'm from Texas." "Oh, so you're familiar with the Bushes." [me: sigh, looking over his shoulder for the dog] "Yes, I'm familiar with the Bushes." "Maybe you can help me out in this election." "I'll Google you to learn more about your record." "If I were you, I'd Google me from the computer of someone you don't like, if you know what I mean." [me: prolonged clenched teeth and polite smile] "I'll do that. You'd better go find your dog! Good luck to you!" [him: hesitation -- let go of the stupid conversation or go find the dog] "OK, goodbye!"

Story of my life: NEVER the "meet cute." Always the "meet cuckoo." :)

1 comment:

casu2 said...

LOL, you really should write for
the screen: those everyday life situations which go over the top
are great- "Beth And The City"! :)