Friday, November 11, 2011


At a UT mock trial Thursday that I got $10-an-hour for attending as a mock juror, I could not stop looking at the student defense attorney. She was insanely movie-star-looking: chiseled features, dark red hair, the proverbial "alabaster" skin, about a size 0...

Before I sat down in the mock court-room, I'd been hanging out in the hallway, where I'd seen her walk by and wondered, "Who in the world is THAT?" It looked like she was wearing a cocktail dress -- sleeveless, extremely form-fitting. By the time we were both in the mock courtroom and I realized she was going to be one of the lawyers I'd be critiquing, she'd put on a conservative jacket... and pearls... over the cocktail dress, but one thing remained the same...

The Louboutins, with those famous red soles! I'd only seen them on TV, but never in real life!

Oh my god!

Once she opened her mouth to present her case, a little of the lustre wore off: At first, she was a little mush-mouthed and didn't make a lot of eye contact with the jurors. She really seemed like a stereotypical 1950s Upper East Side society girl (who also looked like a model from a 1952 "Vogue" -- NOT "stereotypical" at all for 2011 in Austin, I suppose -- where does this girl come from?)! But after a bit, she kicked in and was actually arguing good points and making a few mildly sarcastic asides (which her opposing student attorney always called her on before the judge, and which the judge, at the end of the trial, admonished her about: "Juries don't like sarcasm." Oh, but I do!)

In the end, we jurors all voted unanimously in her favor. Because of the FACTS, of course! :)

When the judge sitting in (actually a real-life judge doing the law school a favor) asked us jurors for opinions on both the presentation of facts AND the personal style of the attorneys... I didn't want to knock her publicly, so kept quiet. But the truth is: I could not stop looking at her Louboutins the whole time. Maybe she should tone it down a bit for real-life juries in the future? Or maybe just continue to be a real visual treat and distraction, plebes be damned... What a dilemma for her career... :)

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