Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Vagaries of Freelancing

I'm half-German, which is most likely why I like my ORDNUNG ("order")! Which is most certainly what I did not get today at work!

Around 10:30am, my boss came in the office that we 4 temps have been sharing (me in this room since May though I'd worked at the department since March, the others there since July). I heard her talking quietly, one-by-one, with the 3 others, then she came over to me with the news: The department has suddenly run out of money, so we should all just go home!

Whaaaaa?!

OK, so we were all scheduled to end the jobs next Friday the 31st anyway, so it's not like I had tenure or anything! But still, I was a bit discombobulated! Over the next week-and-a-half, I'd planned on gradually cleaning out the files I'd saved over the past 6 months and taking down the few minor decorations I'd put up (just Joan and New Yorker cartoons), and having time to contemplate, "Oh, this my last lunch I'll have at the cafeteria across the street" and "This is the last lunch I'll have at the mall up the block" and "This is the last cigarette I'll smoke while sitting on this wall" and even, "This is the last time I'll catch this bus and make this 8-minute walk down this hill." Stupid little minor goodbyes to a source of security (both mental and financial) over the past 6 months.

But nah. Instead, a hectic last 2 hours of both cleaning up 6 months of work/life and getting a bit of last-minute work in before leaving after a half-day.

We may all be called back tomorrow to finish out our week-and-a-half, if the department "figures out" what happened to the money in their account that paid us. Or we may not be. (Probably the latter.)

I'm kind of mad at myself that I can't just "roll with the flow and/or punches." This isn't THAT big of a deal. It's only a week-and-a-half of work, after all. But a week-and-a-half in which I would have earned $1700, for one thing! That would have been a whole MONTH of rent/bills for me. Or a new computer. Or a trip to Boston in the fall.

And, just in general, it's kind of disturbing that nobody was minding the payroll accounts store! How in the hell do you JUST figure out one morning: "Ooops! We can't pay you!" and then tell people 10 minutes later, "B'bye! Get out!"

So I came home and took a 4-hour depression nap in the afternoon; now I'll probably be up 'til 4 or 5am. Shades of my life/schedule for the 2 years previous to this gig. Ugh.

I need some ordnung.

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