Saturday, August 31, 2013

"I Am Not Ashamed"

I've been searching online for Barbara Payton's 1963 autobiography "I Am Not Ashamed" for weeks now, unable to find a copy for under $50 (and even that a re-issue from 2004, also now out of print), which I wasn't willing to pay... Today on eBay, thought I'd try yet another search... and look what I just won for a grand "Buy It Now" total (including s/h) of $8.33!!
The eclectic "taste" of the seller cracks me up; and I certainly hadn't thought of early '90s personalities Reiser and Joe Bob Briggs for a while. Aside from the Payton book, I'll probably keep all of the rest except for Reiser's, whose bon mots I'm quite sure don't apply to anyone any more. (Did they ever, except to a generic, office-conversation-conscious group of Yuppies for about 6 months in 1994?) 
Payton and the Trapp Family and early/mid Bruce, on the other hand, are timeless. (Joe Bob Briggs kind of an early pop-culture libertarian.)


e.f. bartlam said...

I'm really curious about Barbara Payton too...after reading your post.

Some people seem very sensitive to the implications of the prevailing existential mood...or whatever.

Maybe they're just raw products of it. You have people like Camus...who keenly understands the implications of a presumed Godless Universe...but, doesn't blow his brains out. Then there's Payton who seems to ache for unconscious raw experience.

I don't know

Beth Austin said...

Whoa! "Then there's Payton who seems to ache for unconscious raw experience" --- EXACTLY! Before I started reading more about her, I thought she was just a "floozy," but your line above was EXACTLY what I realized after learning more. But then I get irritated with her for not (at least subconsciously) understanding Camus's theory of survival. My idol Joan Crawford, for instance, slept around plenty as did Payton, yet always kept her wits about her and made a point of learning The Game. Payton couldn't/wouldn't do the same.