Thursday, February 20, 2014

"Buses can be fun! Buses...

...keep you in touch with 'The Streets' and your geography! Buses let you avoid Road Rage and enjoy reading while someone else drives..."

Unless you're on the bus for almost 2-1/2 hours a day! Mornings have been fine; a special company bus picks us up, and there are only about 10 of us on there, and there are NO stops until we get to the company. Afternoons, though: The company bus schedule is schewed for me, so I've been taking a regular city bus home... complete with all of the writhing masses of humanity. Such WMH are fine for about 15-20 minutes. Decidedly NOT FINE for over an hour, being wedged in among screeching idiots. Aside from the screechers, other pet peeves:

(1) Have your fucking bus pass (or dollar) READY when you get on the bus! Yes, if you've just run for the bus and get on huffing and puffing, I understand that you then have to search through your belongings to fish the pass out. But if you've already been standing there watching the bus approach? (I SEE you!) Get yer goddamn pass out ahead of time so you can swipe in a timely fashion!

(2) Get on in the front, get OFF IN THE BACK, ya fuckin' idiots! Do those of you unnecessarily getting off via the front door not understand that there are people necessarily getting ON at the front door? Do ya think you could avoid a logjam by exiting where you're supposed to?

(3) If the bus is crowded, then GET YER BACKPACK OFF THE SEAT NEXT TO THE WINDOW AND SCOOT YOUR ASS OVER! Jesus H. Christ. People need to sit down where your stupid backpack is.

(4) If there's not an aisle seat readily available to you, then, for fuck's sake: ASK someone with their stupid backpack in a seat if you can sit there. Just DON'T instead decide that it's a GREAT idea to stand right in front of the Exit door for miles -- where every single person leaving the bus has to squeeze past you!

(5) If the bus, because of backed-up traffic, has to stop 20 feet or so from the "official stop," then... do everybody a favor and WALK THE DAMN 20 FEET AND GET ON THE BUS! Why do you stand there like an idiot and wait for the light to change so the bus can pull up right to you, thus making everybody have to sit through yet ANOTHER light??

Why do I even have to mention these things??

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